Visible Minority

Visible minority

I bet that the combination of words, visible minority, have flown past you without giving the literal meaning much thought. That changes quickly when you look like me (born in Ireland) and you travel in India.

When I travel, I like to observe, take pictures and try me best to soak it all in. I want to blend in, become invisible, and, above all, I don't want to feel like a tourist.

On our trip to India this has been next to impossible. I am constantly targeted by street vendors, store owners, taxi drivers, and the poor.

I am truly in the minority because of how I look and I am often treated differently because of It. Sometimes it works out in my favour ( like when I need help at a hotel) but just as often it works against me (like when I'm waiting in line for something and someone ignores me in favour of someone else).

It's something that followed me in all 6 of the weeks we have traveled in India. On one hand all the relatives want to make sure that I, the foreigner, am OK and looked after. But I also have to put up with people, staring at me ( and my kids).

It also manifests itself in an usual way. When we go to visit a fort, or some other tourist attraction, people often ask me about taking pictures. Usually, I expect that they want me to take a picture of their whole family

But it's not what you think. They don't want me to take pictures of them with their family. They want me to be IN the picture with their family. I have become a tourist attraction. At first I said no to these requests, especially if they asked about taking pictures of the kids. Now, I laugh it off and happily get in the picture with strangers and let them take as many pictures as they want.

Of course, the take home lesson here is that I have had a life changing trip. I have walking in someone else's shoes and found it distasteful. I, now, can more readily emphasize with people in our Canadian society who may be marginalized based on the color of their skin.

And I find it funny that their are probably about 10 different individuals that are showing group photos to their loved ones and explaining about the big Canadian guy standing right in the middle.

Photo journals

Alas, our trip is almost over. I have taken over 1000 pictures (many of which I've edited and posted from my iPad).

My workflow f choice has been to take a most of my photos with our DSLR. Then I take out the card and import the pictures to my iPad using the photo connection kit. Once imported onto the iPad, I've been using iPhoto to crop, enhance and organize them.  I have really enjoyed getting to know the iPhoto app. It is a real powerhouse when it comes to taking a good photo and making it spectacular.

Finally, I have been using the photo journal component to post the collections to to iCloud to share with Granny and Grandad back in Toronto.

Here is a link to all our photo journals from our trip:
http://bit.ly/Oddsr5

The only downside I've encountered is that once you edit the photos in iPhoto it can be difficult to get them back out  to the camera roll because. Currently you need to export them back one at a time rather than as a batch..hopefully it's just a glitch which can be correct later.

Giving Back (by Sunjay and Sangeeta)

For my birthday this year, I decided that I would like to raise money to take and donate in India because I felt like we have so much and they have so little. My sister and I also brought stuffed animals to give away.

When we got to India, we found out that one of our aunts volunteered in a school in Dharavi, the biggest slum area in Bombay. Families live in shacks one on top of the other, with an "outhouse" that drains into a creek. Parents have very little time to supervise their children because they are often out working when the kids come home from school. School is free until grade 7 and for only three kids per family. If you have a fourth child, you have to pay for their education.

We decided to donate the money and our stuffed animals to this school. We wondered what the school might need...should we buy pencils or books? Our aunt spoke to one teacher who said she wanted the kids to do some writing, so we took the money and bought writing notebooks for the students.

That day at the school was eye-opening. The kids were curious to see 4 foreigners walking in the school. Some of the kids were friendly, but most were shy. They were wearing school uniforms, yet some did not have shoes.

The classroom looked so different from what we are used to...there were 3 kids to one desk, paint peeling off the walls, and no visible school supplies. The noise level when we entered was very high and the teacher was trying to control the class, by pulling some kids apart who were fighting.

We were introduced and we handed out the notebooks and the stuffed animals one by one. The expressions on their faces made us feel good. We could see they were happy and excited and we felt great to be donating to such a needy school.

At the door stood more kids from other classes. How can we do more? Having someone from our family helping us is a huge advantage because now we have a connection to this school. When we can donate in the future, we know the money is going to kids that need it.

Begging in Mumbai

Every journey worth taking, whether it's spiritual, emotional or geographical, has a major obstacle (or two) to overcome.

In India, one of those emotional obstacles are the beggars. Typically,  your first encounter with beggars in India takes place as you first touch down at an airport and you struggle to get your bearings as those sliding glass doors open the assault on the senses begins. If you are non-Indian, like me, then you are instantly targeted by the taxi drivers....and the beggars.

When a pre-teen comes to you holding an infant and asking for money it's impossible not to want to help; to make a difference. To buy that young girl a meal, or just give here the money in your wallet. The feelings of injustice rise up within you...and as you give the money a (short- lived) feeling of satisfaction flows over you. Then you notice the increasingly large crowd starting to assemble. You see the other half dozen pre-teens with infants starting to gather and any feelings of satisfaction quickly dissipate.

My wife Sangeeta is one of those people who wants to help as many people as she can. When we arrived in Delhi, she decided to give to a small group of children near our car. That group quickly became about 20....but she made sure that each and every person got something. Unfortunately, the group continued to ask for more and we had difficulty leaving the parking lot. The crowd kept coming back for more, unsatisfied with our first offering. We left the parking lot feeling annoyed rather than positive. 

I have since searched for a satisfying symbol or representation to put the problem of poverty and begging in some form of tangible framework that I can more easily come to terms with. It's as if you see some small child on the beach and there some huge wave coming ashore...and you are there standing with an umbrella trying to stop it from crashing ashore. Your intentions are noble but the wave still knocks you head over heals and you are left with a a bad taste in your mouth, a bruised ego and the child was still pounded by the wave. You could argue that no one was really helped in the process.

When I am really honest with myself, I know that framing poverty in this way allows me to, if I want to, absolve myself from trying to help for what can you do in the face of a tsunami of hands reaching out...

Often, when you talk to Indians about beggars, they typically explain that the beggars are really working for a beggar master that will take all their money. "Don't give them money because they will just give it to someone else."...it's easy not to help people if you think they are part of some underworld beggar syndicate who borrow babies to extort money from sympathetic strangers.

I will end this post with a story from the other day. We were out shopping and about to spend a small Indian fortune at Cinnabon. (The irony of that last sentence is not lost on me). We were about to enter the store when Sangeeta saw a mother and her barefoot girl begging for money. The girl couldn't have been more than 2 or 3. They asked for money and I had already said no when my wife took them over to a roadside shop and bought them some milk and a loaf of bread. The mother wasn't as happy as we were to see her daughter eating the bread and chugging the bottle of milk as we went to get our Cinnabons.









Sent from my iPad

M and R News

What should you do on a rainy Bombay afternoon? Make some mock news shows of course. Here are two news shows written, directed and produced by my daughter Maneesha and nephew Rohun.

M& R News Part 1

M& R News Part 2

Our Journey

This trip has been an amazing experience for all of us. Camel rides, boat trips, and most of all meeting new aunts and uncles, cousins and friends. Something that was one my favourites was going to Agra and staying at the hotel for two nights and going to the Taj Mahal the first day.The hotel had a swimming pool, a kids club and peacocks that were so beautiful. We shopped a lot not just for us but for other people too. We are about halfway through our trip and there is still lots more to write about. 
 Bye for now. 
 Maneesha

Honk Horn Please

One of the the most exhilarating parts of our trip to India has been experiencing the driving!

To the uninitiated, driving in India is without rules or civility. Lanes, as well as red or green lights, are often only suggestions. Honking your horn means, hello, I'm here rather than get the $@# out of he way.

We have experienced the streets of India in cars, vans, auto-rickshaws, bicycle-rickshaws, and scooters. Still to be experienced are elephants, camels, and horse- drawn tongas...but there's still tons of time left.

Whenever I can, I've been videotaping the frenzied trips, quickly editing in iMovie on my phone and posting the cam videos on YouTube.

Here for your viewing pleasure are some of our "CAM" videos with more to come.

Cheers and honk horn please!

Scooter CAM

Auto-rickshaw CAM

camel CAM

Tin box by Sangeeta

Happy birthday to my Swaraj Masi, who turns 80 tomorrow!

I know she is getting older, but she has the face of a young girl and the mischievous smile of someone with a secret. The secret to life, I suppose.

She has lived most of her life in India, coming over with her parents and brother from Lahore, before India and Pakistan separated.

I'm sure the India she remembers is very different than it is now. Even in the 15 years since we visited, there is more of everything: buildings, traffic, satellite dishes and large shopping malls.

Yet somehow, my Masi lives a simple, happy life. One which we can all learn from.

She doesn't drive, but it doesn't really matter because everything she needs is close by: a market within walking distance, a large front porch where she can sit and enjoy the outdoors, neighbours in her housing complex that drop in for unexpected, but welcome visits and a devoted husband who keeps track of her medical needs and is her constant companion.

She also has a tin box. One that holds so many wonderful memories in the form of black and white photos. She decided to go through them one night and took great pleasure in showing me photos of my parents, cousins and other relatives from a time gone by.

I imagine that it was a time when she learned about planning meals that would be enough to feed the family without wasting food. Or a time when people took pleasure in going for walks after dinner and socializing face-to-face. Or it was a time when people were committed to their partners and family life.

I hope I can be fortunate enough to have a tin box in my future that helps me to remember the simple things in life.

Our adventure by Sunjay

When I first arrived in India I thought there would be less to see but I've seen more now than I excepted throughout the whole trip. India is an amazing place. I've met so much family, seen so many places, eaten so much food and overall had the experience of a lifetime. I hope I can come back and see all the amazing places and my wonderful family that I will miss when I have to leave. Part of me misses all my friends in Canada but the rest of me will never want to leave.

There were many highlights of the trip so far such as a motorcycle ride, racing my relatives down by the sea face, learning to play cricket and hanging out with family. I have met so many people here, aunts and uncles I had never met before, who have been so hospitable and kind to me on our adventure. But the trip isn't over. I continue to have quite the experience and I hope It continues right until we have to leave.

Service or Servitude?

How quickly we have become adjusted to the way of life in India.

We eat rotis at every meal, we turn fans on once entering a room, we hang our clothes on the line to dry after the rain, we mix some Hindi words into conversation. 

And in some ways, we are adopting the lifestyle of my family which may not be so typical of the Indian way of living. Cars and drivers at our disposal, food of every kind available, and servants who can do everything for you. That is the one thing I can't get used to, asking someone to do the things I normally do for myself, like washing my own clothes or setting the table. Even as a young kid visiting India, I would wonder why it was seemed unusual to others when I put my dishes in the sink after meals. 

In my aunt's house I have counted 6 women who come and go for cooking and cleaning. Someone will also come to your home for massages, if you wish. There is one woman who is in her seventies and often sits on the floor in the corner while we eat. Her name is Tara Bhen. Each time I look at her, I feel compelled to smile and say thank you and when she smiles a toothy grin at me, I consider the question: Is she happy? Does giving her work and a place to stay ease our guilt or is it generosity? Will there be a time when having servants will not be an option in India?

And maybe it's not just in India. Many families in our Toronto neighbourhood employ nannies to help care for their children. The job may also include cleaning the house, cooking meals or walking the dog. It may involve very little vacation time and hours beyond the 8-9 hours a day that we work.

So, maybe it isn't about the place and service, but really human rights and servitude. I really believe we are obligated to treat each and every human being with dignity and while we can justify that giving people work to do can keep them off the streets, we do not have the right to yell when they make a mistake, embarrass them in front of others and then blame them for a lack of responsibility.

I will continue to be awed by Tara Bhen, who is taking care of 11 foreigners without complaining. When I asked if I could take her picture for this entry, she was reluctant to smile and then later questioned why I was taking her photo. I had to have the message translated because I wanted to make sure it was correct: "Because I want everyone to see you and know how much you do for us."

Flower market photo journal

Here's a link to an iPhoto gallery of our visit to a flower market

The First Day (by Maneesha)

(12:30pm) our adventure begins! We hopped out of our seats, grabbed our luggage and walked to the exit from British airways. We walked right by the flight attendant as she waved goodbye. I felt a mixture of nervousness and excitement in my stomach. I cant wait! We have been waiting 1 or 2 years for this trip .

THIS IS IT!

We walk out of the airplane into the airport. We line up to get our bags checked ( it took up to 10 or 15 minutes). When we finished, we picked up our big luggage and left. (Altogether we had 11 pieces of luggage-Yikes) A few minutes later our grandfather (Nana) came to pick us up. When we stepped outside of the airport we felt like we were in a whole different universe.

 I felt a blast of heat come and boil me up. It was so hot I felt I was going to have heat stroke. I was only paying attention to the heat, I didn't even notice how loud it was. BEEP! HONK! BEEP! HONK! Then we all  realized that everyone was honking! HONK! BEEP! HONK! It struck again. It was so loud. I realized you have to honk every time you come around the corner or up the street.to let people know that you are coming. If you look around, you will see a corner where all the cars come to pick you up. 5, 10, or 15 minutes later, a car came to pick us up and then we left.

We Made It!

Well, after almost 20 hours of travelling, we made it safe and sound. The flights were fine but crowded. People were either over-the-top nice or (more often) not so much. For example, try arriving near the end of boarding only to see that no one has left any space in the overhead bins and you and your family need to find room for 5 carry-on bags. People show their character pretty quickly when you ask them if you can move your stuff.! !




We arrived in Mumbai at 2 in the morning and were greeted by the monsoons. As expected, the 30 min drive from the airport to the beautiful building we are staying in was full of contrasts. Leaving the airport, my first impression was that of growth and construction. Later in journey we noticed the dogs in the street or the occasional person sleeping on the sidewalk or in the bus shelter. It's an interesting way to start your journey into India. In the night you only get glimpses of what will be revealed later!

What technology to bring

After 15 years, my beautiful wife and I, and the two kids are about to embark on a life-changing trip to India. My wife who was born in India, is the visionary in our family. She has been the real spearhead in moving us towards this great adventure.


One of my jobs, is to organize the technology that we will be bring with us. If you know me, then this is something that I relish. Technology that will allow us to photograph our journey, write this blog and keep the kids entertained (and us sane) when needed. Because it will be I who has to carry all this tech, I have to make sure that we (I) don't go overboard.


Attached is a picture of all the potential tech items that could be lugged through India:


Here is what I think I'll bring:
Photography
-My iPhone (I'm not going to use it as a phone..too costly..but I do want to be able snap and share pictures quickly..provided I have some wifi)
-point and shoot for the kids to take pictures
-digital SLR and lenses (we have a canon Rebel Si and three lenses: a telephoto lens, normal lens that came with the camera a newly acquired fixed 50mm lens that I'm excited to tryout. If have to leave one behind, it will be the telephoto lens..it's the heaviest)


Tech
-My iPad (I'll load it with apps and movies including the Blogger app to blog on the go)
-My iPhone as noted above
-my sons iPhone touch
-my daughters older iPhone touch


Other
-plugin electrical converter to change everything in India.


Kinda looks like a lot of stuff. Hopefully lugging all this stuff around India for 6 weeks will be manageable. Wish me luck!

Going Home (By Sangeeta)

I’m going home. After 41 years in Canada, I still consider India to be my home.

I have memories that will be a part of me forever. Like driving down Marine Drive with the windows wide open, seeing children outside the taxi asking for help, drinking coconut water and eating fresh paans, going to the market and being bombarded by the colours of the fabrics and the voices of people offering deals. 

We watched a movie about India last night and I don’t think any words ring truer than, “Can there be anywhere else in the world that is such an assault on the senses?”

There is something when you first step out of the plane that is so intoxicating. Maybe it’s the humidity, or the smells, or knowing that my grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins will be there to greet me and welcome me home.

Unfortunately, there will be less family to meet this time. I will miss the way my grandmother would try to slip more food on my plate, the way my Vinoo Kaka whistled without a care in the world and my Sarla Kaki’s smile. I’m sorry I didn’t get there sooner to touch their feet and say one last “Aavjo”.

It’s been too long. Too long, since I reconnected with who I am and where I come from. But at least this time, I get to share it with Colin and the kids. I can’t wait to make new memories with them and show them the beauty of my home.

For the kids, I wish a lifetime connection to their heritage and an appreciation of all that they have. I hope that when they see how some people have to live in India, they will realize that there can be happiness in simplicity. We live complicated lives, where sometimes it is easy to take our good fortune and privileges for granted.

I, for one, will not be taking this trip for granted. Look out India, here I come!!!